THE PERFECT MAN Episode 29 After the first night I kissed Bryan, I knew I was gone. I had fallen in love with a white guy. My colleagues teased me unbearably about it. Tanya from Kenya and Zola from Ethiopia, we were the three musketeers in my department. Tanya for one couldn't believe it. In her words, white dudes lacked the very essence of humanity and that was being black. So they couldn't satisfy black women, no matter how hard they tried. I begged to differ. Bryan satisfied me in more ways than one and I was as black as you could get. His kisses stirred places in me I didn't know existed. Each night, after he dropped me off, I touched myself to images of him. If his kisses could do that to me, I wondered what his shaft would be capable of. Zola scoffed when I shared my thoughts with her 'White men got soft and pinkish penis,' she said, laughing 'Get out,' I replied 'I'm serious babe. I have dated a few white men you know, trust me. I know what I'm saying,' 'I've heard you. Pink is cute too. I mean, who doesn't like pink?' 'Hahahaha,' she laughed, 'whatever rocks your boat honey. Just let me know when he seals the deal, and you tell me if you are delighted or disappointed,' My friend's reservations in my dating Bryan only made me more determined. I felt we had kissed enough. It was time to know if he was pink down there or whatever colour he was supposed to be. I googled 'how to make love to a white man', just to equip myself with first hand information. There was nothing actually different but Tanya insisted otherwise 'White people are into a whole lot of kinky and dangerous sex babe, you've got to be real careful hun,' she said 'Now that's racial profiling Tanya.' 'Well sue me, Kamsi. I've heard they could tie you up and beat you up all in the name of sex.' 'God, you lie alot Tanya.' 'I'm not lying. Denise, my dorm mate had to call the cops on herself cause her white boyfriend handcuffed her to the bed post and couldn't find the key afterwards. Most embarrassing moment of her life. I swear, I'm not lying dear. For real.' 'Ok, got that. So no handcuffs. Thanks Tanya. Anything else you might want to add,' I asked, laughing. 'Yea, duh! Don't die, be safe.' We laughed simultaneously. It was all talk but it got me worried. Was I dating a psycho? Were all white dudes crazy? These questions bothered me all week and he noticed the next time we met. My aunty went to the mall, so I invited him over 'Baby, what's up,' he said. I loved the way he called me baby. I truly felt like one 'Emmmmm, nothing really.' 'Come on. I can tell when you're flustered. You tend to stutter.' What was on my mind wasn't something that could be shared, especially not with him. 'Emmmmm,' I said again, thinking of the best way to change the topic. He pulled closer to me and placed a buttery kiss on my eyelids. Tbc


'Kamsi, you know you can tell me anything right?' He continued plastering the soft kisses round my face. I wondered how he could sound so strong and yet do things so soft. I began to feel the wetness in between my legs. As usual, my body was about to let me down

'Zola said you have a pink and tiny penis, while Tanya said you could handcuff me and throw away the keys. She said white peple acted like that,' I blurted out. It felt good to get it off my chest.

I looked at Bryan, he was literally laughing out loud. I was a little bit ashamed. He took a minute to stop laughing and pulled me to him

'Firstly kamsi, that's racist and secondly, come feel this,' he put my hand on his erection and I exclaimed out loud

'Now does that feel tiny, baby?'

I couldn't talk, I just shook my head.

'Well I can't say much about the colour. I mean, pink is a great colour.' He smiled

'I know. That is exactly what I said.'

'And I'm not into kinky S&M, so have no fear honey. I won't handcuff you, unless you want me to. That's if it's your thing.'

I let out a big sigh of relief. I felt stupid for ever thinking about that. I had to apologise in the only way I knew how to.

I reached for his lips and planted mine on them. I felt his heart beat as I placed my hand on his chest, pushing him gently to the wall. He leaned down to my ear and placed a soft kiss on it before biting it softly. I couldn't help blushing and the sound of my own heart pounding inside my chest alerted me to the fact that I was falling deeply in love with him.

He looked into my eyes, his were the colour of sky. I wanted to fly in them. His tongue, tracing my ears to the collar bone, was so warm. I didn't want him to ever stop. He pulled back and gazed at me, I was lost in his eyes. I smiled.

I reached for his pants, to free him from such ungodly entrapment, when his hands stopped me. He was pointing to the door

'Not today love, your aunty is at the door.'
I rubbed my eyes to clear it properly and it was truly Bryan, in flesh and blood. No wonder chief Nnamdi's car was parked outside. Bryan had probably shown up some few minutes ago and my dad, in shock had called his elder brother to come and see what he had seen.
Bryan moved to hug me, but I stopped him and pulled him towards the gate. I saw Nneka, still grinning sheepishly.

'What in heaven's name are you doing here Bryan?'

'I came back for you. I made a mistake leaving in the first place, but I'm here to right that wrong.'

He smiled smugly. I had missed this face.

'Bryan it's too late. You should not have left in the first place. I'm pregnant.'

'It's never late and I really don't mind. Do you love the father of the baby?'

'You shouldn't have come back Bryan. I was about to break the news of my pregnancy to my folks and now, you would be caught in the crossfire.'

'He's not here?' He looked perplexed

'Who?' I asked, confused

'The baby daddy.'

'No, he isn't,' I said, swiping the wetness off my cheek

I couldn't tell him of Olumide's demise, at least not yet. My eyes were filled with tears. Bryan gave me a thoughtful look. I sensed he wanted me to say something more, but I couldn't. Chief Omeka was probably breaking the news to my father as we spoke.

'Go to Primak hotel Bryan, when I'm done, I would come see you and tell you everything.'

'I could stay, you know, just to be here for you.'

'I know. But I've got to do this alone. Thanks for coming back for me and I'm so sorry.'

'Sssssssshhhhh,' he put his fingers accross my lips

'Just so you know, I'm never leaving again without you. Even if it means relocating to Nigeria, I'm ready. Anything to be with you.'

'You say that now, but you may back out later.'

'Baby, there's no going back.'

I buried my head in his shoulder and it fit, just as it always did. It was as if he never left. Tears were streaming from my eyes and I had no control over them. He was lifting my head for a kiss when my gate burst open and my father stormed out, we jumped apart

'You,' he screamed, pointing at me ,'Get inside now. And you,' he said, pointing at Bryan, 'if you still value your life, you will disappear right now.'

Bryan started to say something and I remembered what chief Omeka had said and I hushed him

'Go Bryan, we will see later.'

He hesitated initially but finally relented and got into the black saloon car and the driver sped away. It felt like he was leaving me again. I wanted to run after him, to beg him to take me along when a shove from my father crashed me back to reality

'Are you mad kamsi, have you lost your senses? Will you run inside before I slap you to death.'

I literally ran inside because I had no doubt he would slap me. I got into the sitting room and it was a tense and hostile atmosphere. Nneka was kneeling close to my mum, who was wailing and rolling on the floor. Chief Omeka had finally broken the news to them. I looked at chief Nnamdi and he was, in his exaggerated stance, gesticulating as if someone had died. My father walked in behind me and sat down. He said nothing. Chief Omeka spoke up

'Eloka, be strong, at least she did not attempt to abort the baby. She could have lost her life.'

My father sighed

'It would have been better Omeka. She should have died. Why would God give me a child that has insisted on killing me. When I was childless, I had peace of mind.'

I joined Nneka in kneeling close to my mother. Her uncontrolled sobs were the only sounds to be heard. If someone walked in now, the person would think we lost someone.

'Kamsi, I gbu go m, you have killed me. You have succeeded where the devil failed. Thank you Kamsi, thank you,' my mum said, still crying

'Mummy she's sorry. It wasn't her intention,' Nneka interjected

'Oh oh Nneka, it wasn't her intention. What else did she have in mind when she was opening her leg for that useless white boy?'

Nneka looked at me after my mother's admission. Oops, they thought Bryan was responsible for my pregnancy. How I wished he was, it would have made my life easier.

'Eloka, I blame you,' chief Nnamdi said

'When I asked you not to let her go to florida, they said I was a wicked man. Now have you seen? The only thing she learnt abroad is how to bring shame to the family. Chai.'

'Daddy...'

'If I hear my name in that your mouth, I will cut your tongue off,' he shouted, cutting me off.

'This is the thank you I deserve for sending you abroad to further your education. This is how you pay me back for paying your school fees and making sure you never lacked, ehn? Kamsi you are a wicked child.'

My mum was still crying, but at least she had stopped rolling. She used her wrapper to clean her eyes. She was lost in her thoughts, but all of a sudden, she spoke up

'How many months pregnant are you Kamsi?'

'Ma?'

'Are you now deaf? I said how many months pregnant are you?'

I knew why she was asking. Bryan had left almost four months ago. There was no way I was four months pregnant in her house and she didn't notice. She was a better mother than that.

'Mummy, I don't know. I can't remember.'

'If you did all this to marry your white man, just know it won't work. Not in this house, not while I'm alive,' my dad said, gesticulating at me.

'Daddy, Bryan is not responsible for my pregnancy.'

'What!' they all chorused simultaneously.

There was no point in leading them on. Bryan wasn't responsible and the earlier they knew, the better for everyone involved.

'What do you mean by he's not responsible? Is he not the person I saw outside?' My father asked

'Who is responsible?' Chief Omeka asked

'Kamsi has killed me o. My child o,' my mother kept screaming

'Nneka where were you when your friend was sleeping up and down o. Nneka o,' my mother went on

'Mummy, I wasn't sleeping up and down. I made one mistake and I'm ready to bear the consequences.'

'You still have the mouth to talk? If you don't shut up now, I will slap your mouth off,' my father said

I was beginning to lose count of the number of times my father had threatened to slap me. If slapping me would make him feel better, I wouldn't mind offering him my face.

'Eloka, what has happened has happened. The next question is what next.' Chief Nnamdi said

'Hmmmm, my brother, what will I do o,' my father asked

'If it was the white man that got her pregnant, I would have married her off this night.'

'Eloka, we need to decide what to do and now. Before words will leave this house. This kind of abomination must be taken care of immediately.'

'I blame her mother o. Chai. I've suffered o.'

My father turned to my mother who was still crying to floor and pointed at her.

'It is you I blame. If you had not pampered her, she won't be this foolish. Both of you have succeeded. You have finished me.'

I was getting vexed. They were all about it like I killed someone. It was just a baby for God's sake. I made to get up but Nneka held me down. She had already sensed I was about to talk back.

'How will you blame me? Am I not a good role model for her. Was it not you my husband that impregnated me, ehn?'

'Who else will I blame?'

'Eloka take it easy. Blames will not help anybody. She's still your daughter.' Chief Omeka said, pleading with my father to remain calm.

'Whose daughter? Omeka unless she's yours, I do not know this devilish child.'

I had had enough of his outrageous remarks. He was going to disown me because I was pregnant. My dad was definitely a joker. I pulled off Nneka's hand from my legs and got up from my kneeling position. Someone had to put an end to this. I didn't see anyone else volunteering, so it had to be me. Chief Omeka's earlier advice sailing out of my brain.

'Can you people, especially you dad, please stop acting like someone died or I killed someone. I'm not the first person to get pregnant, neither am I going to be the last. If you people didn't chase Bryan away in the first place, all these wouldn't have happened. So please, cut me some slack, really and be the parents I need right now.'

This time around, when the slap came, I was expecting it.
Tbc
THE PERFECT MAN Episode 29 After the first night I kissed Bryan, I knew I was gone. I had fallen in love with a white guy. My colleagues teased me unbearably about it. Tanya from Kenya and Zola from Ethiopia, we were the three musketeers in my department. Tanya for one couldn't believe it. In her words, white dudes lacked the very essence of humanity and that was being black. So they couldn't satisfy black women, no matter how hard they tried. I begged to differ. Bryan satisfied me in more ways than one and I was as black as you could get. His kisses stirred places in me I didn't know existed. Each night, after he dropped me off, I touched myself to images of him. If his kisses could do that to me, I wondered what his shaft would be capable of. Zola scoffed when I shared my thoughts with her 'White men got soft and pinkish penis,' she said, laughing 'Get out,' I replied 'I'm serious babe. I have dated a few white men you know, trust me. I know what I'm saying,' 'I've heard you. Pink is cute too. I mean, who doesn't like pink?' 'Hahahaha,' she laughed, 'whatever rocks your boat honey. Just let me know when he seals the deal, and you tell me if you are delighted or disappointed,' My friend's reservations in my dating Bryan only made me more determined. I felt we had kissed enough. It was time to know if he was pink down there or whatever colour he was supposed to be. I googled 'how to make love to a white man', just to equip myself with first hand information. There was nothing actually different but Tanya insisted otherwise 'White people are into a whole lot of kinky and dangerous sex babe, you've got to be real careful hun,' she said 'Now that's racial profiling Tanya.' 'Well sue me, Kamsi. I've heard they could tie you up and beat you up all in the name of sex.' 'God, you lie alot Tanya.' 'I'm not lying. Denise, my dorm mate had to call the cops on herself cause her white boyfriend handcuffed her to the bed post and couldn't find the key afterwards. Most embarrassing moment of her life. I swear, I'm not lying dear. For real.' 'Ok, got that. So no handcuffs. Thanks Tanya. Anything else you might want to add,' I asked, laughing. 'Yea, duh! Don't die, be safe.' We laughed simultaneously. It was all talk but it got me worried. Was I dating a psycho? Were all white dudes crazy? These questions bothered me all week and he noticed the next time we met. My aunty went to the mall, so I invited him over 'Baby, what's up,' he said. I loved the way he called me baby. I truly felt like one 'Emmmmm, nothing really.' 'Come on. I can tell when you're flustered. You tend to stutter.' What was on my mind wasn't something that could be shared, especially not with him. 'Emmmmm,' I said again, thinking of the best way to change the topic. He pulled closer to me and placed a buttery kiss on my eyelids. Tbc THE PERFECT MAN 
Episode 29
After the first night I kissed Bryan,  I knew I was gone. I had fallen in love with a white guy. My colleagues teased me unbearably about it. Tanya from Kenya and Zola from Ethiopia, we were the three musketeers in my department. Tanya for one couldn't believe it. In her words, white dudes lacked the very essence of humanity and that was being black. So they couldn't satisfy black women, no matter how hard they tried.

I begged to differ. Bryan satisfied me in more ways than one and I was as black as you could get. His kisses stirred places in me I didn't know existed. Each night, after he dropped me off, I touched myself to images of him. If his kisses could do that to me, I wondered what his shaft would be capable of. Zola scoffed when I shared my thoughts with her

'White men got soft and pinkish penis,' she said, laughing 

'Get out,' I replied 

'I'm serious babe. I have dated a few white men you know, trust me. I know what I'm saying,'

'I've heard you. Pink is cute too. I mean, who doesn't like pink?'

'Hahahaha,' she laughed, 'whatever rocks your boat honey. Just let me know when he seals the deal, and you tell me if you are delighted or disappointed,'

My friend's reservations in my dating Bryan only made me more determined. I felt we had kissed enough. It was time to know if he was pink down there or whatever colour he was supposed to be. I googled 'how to make love to a white man', just to equip myself with first hand information. There was nothing actually different but Tanya insisted otherwise 

'White people are into a whole lot of kinky and dangerous sex babe, you've got to be real careful hun,' she said

'Now that's racial profiling Tanya.'

'Well sue me, Kamsi. I've heard they could tie you up and beat you up all in the name of sex.'

'God, you lie alot Tanya.'

'I'm not lying. Denise, my dorm mate had to call the cops on herself cause her white boyfriend handcuffed her to the bed post and couldn't find the key afterwards. Most embarrassing moment of her life. I swear,  I'm not lying dear. For real.'

'Ok, got that. So no handcuffs. Thanks Tanya. Anything else you might want to add,' I asked, laughing. 

'Yea, duh! Don't die, be safe.'

We laughed simultaneously. It was all talk but it got me worried. Was I dating a psycho? Were all white dudes crazy? These questions bothered me all week and he noticed the next time we met. My aunty went to the mall, so I invited him over

'Baby, what's up,' he said. I loved the way he called me baby. I truly felt like one

'Emmmmm, nothing really.'

'Come on. I can tell when you're flustered. You tend to stutter.'

What was on my mind wasn't something that could be shared, especially not with him. 

'Emmmmm,' I said again, thinking of the best way to change the topic.

He pulled closer to me and placed a buttery kiss on my eyelids. Tbc Reviewed by De SOUL ENERGIZER on July 16, 2017 Rating: 5

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